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Old 12-17-2010, 04:39 PM
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Talking Wife From Hell

The Wife From Hell

A cop pulls over a speeding car.

The officer says, " I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir."

The driver says, "Well officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."

As the cop writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?"

The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did."

As the cop makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Damit, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?"

The cop frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine."

The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket."

The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."

And as the cop is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"

The cop looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?"


"Only when he's had too much to drink."

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Old 12-17-2010, 08:54 PM
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What a clever woman! Absolutely clever and charming too! hahaha
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